My Mind speaks...

Ang sarap ng buhay dito sa Vegas. Daming magaganda pero para sakin blondes really stand out! Wuhooo. Pero syempre wala paring papalit sa mga babae dyan sa pinas dba. hehehe...sayang magpapasko na di ko man lang macecelebrate ito sa sarili kong bansa. . Someday babalik din ako.

Haaaay...naku walang magawa d2 sa LV...buweset...d ko pa napapractice tagalog ko...waaahhh! Lam nyo pag and2 kayo d kayo tatanda ng mabilis...walang pressure...Nagaral ako sa Ateneo I'm just a normal student there pero d2...wow honor student...top 10 sa buong school...haaay mga pilipino talaga ang talino. D naman sa pagyayabang dba...pero totoo naman eh...d lang tayo marunong dumiscarte kaya nagkandalokoloko and bansa natin. Anyway I gotta run...Hey hows my tagalog doin?

Home sick na home sick na ko. Miss ko na ang pinas! I left mga march 20 and know Im here sa Las Vegas. Dami Atenista dito na kaklase ko sa high school miss na namin kayo lahat dyan I'm hoping to come back soon. Sa mga Days with the Lord dyan lalo na ang batch9 miss ko na kayo! See you soon

Its been 25 days seen I have updated my tab. Well I'm quite busy and I don't have the luxury of time to do this. But at least know I have just about 5 minutes to write something about my life. Hmmm...I think I'll tell you about my encounter with a pastor 2 days ago. See my aunt is a seventh day adventise its a religion same as catholic but they have different practices like they don't have nuns and priest. They don't have statues and rosaries. Well they have pastors to guide them in their "worship." So there I was sitting on a wooden chair for 3 freakin hours listening to people telling their stories of how God saved them. How their lives are lived according to his will and bla bla bla bla. I believe in God but I can't stand anymore of this. I went straight to the pastor and asked him a question. Is religion true? Is it really permenent? Or is it a temporary answers to the questions we still can't answer? I mean in the olden times we all thought that the world started with this famous words, "Let there be light." But now we have the big bang theory. A hundred years ago we thought that we came from dirt which God molded to man, however now we came to a conclusion that we came from apes. I mean isn't religion just answers to the questions we are not ready yet to answer. Like whats the purpose of life? Aren't we like kids who are being read by our parents a bed time story telling us that rains came from angels who are crying? Its damn right confusing. Aren't we wasting our time...I think so.

I was sleeping, yet awake for I dreamnt. I have been waiting for this for 2 years. I never have a dream since then. It was bothering me but now it happened. I finally dreamed. I dreamed of a big ocean, no boundaries, no limitations. Just me, my yacht and a girl. We are just crusin the sea not knowing where we're heading. I was looking at her the whole time, but all I could see is her long, black, shiny hair. She has her back facing me and yet I could tell she's beautiful. Her perfect silky skin as bright as the burning sun. Her body so voluptuous and mind blowing. I never saw her face but I bet she's beautiful, she gotta be. And then I woke up. Back to reality.

How extraordinary our mind is. How it makes a simple thing or structure and make it complex and more beautiful. It puts more depth and meaning to it. Its is an unending world, undeniably fiction that only the mind can put into reality. Illusions are inevitable it happens absent mindedly anywhere and any place. It happens when we go out to work, when we walk our dog even when we go to sleep. Its unescapable. It doesn't mean that its beautiful and has more depth to it that it is not scary. It could make us crazy. Indeed every beautiful thing has its demonic opposite. Its like an unending journey that starts and never ends. Your trap and you can't breathe, can't eat, you can't drink. Its hell on earth...Until someone stops usand says. "you''ll now be judge." The journey, piligrim, chaos, pain and suffering ends. Only you and HIM.

Walking silently, stranded in a pitch black road. A road meant for the blind because all you could see is nothing. The path is as silent as a monastery. You could almost hear yourself breathing. Shiver throughout your freezing body as the tempreture drops as you push through this agonizing road. Paranoia sets in as you stride step by step thinking of someone just running at you and slit your throat and leave you for dead. This is the road I have chosen. The road no one dared to travel. A scary, dark and silent road because you will learn to see, listen and be faithful to Him Almighty. I want to be closer...

We moved because life in the Philippines is getting harder. Yeah, things here in the US is better. No pollution, life is easy, the economy is great plus the babes are hot. I really didn't think I'm gonna miss the Philippines this much. Coz that is my personality, adjust and adjust and move on. But for the past days, all I could think about are my friends, classmates, cousins and other relatives. I remember the countless parties I've been with my friends where I get all wasted and pass out. The times we just settle down and talk about our lives and the girls.  I left my life there and I'm starting a new here. And its harder than I have ever imagine. Yeah I keep in touch wit them by phone and email but nothing beats being there present in the flesh. I'm starting to have lots of friends here mostly black people because of basketball. They are very nice and we are tight. But nothing will replace my friends, walang papalit sa pinas! Sa mga kaibigan ko dyan, hintayin niyo ko pagbalik ko party tayo 

My image toward my friends and peers is extreme. I have a very serious side and a very playful side. But I never really showed my romantic and softer side. I wouldn't want them to see me weak and vulnerable. I love rock music and heavy metal but what nobody knows is that my favorite song is a sentimental, love and soft song. Here it is...

WHEREVER YOU ARE
by: Southborder

I love to see the ocean's beauty
And the moon that shines above
Alone in the sand lookin at the stars
Wishing someday I would find true love

Wouldn't be nice to see the morning
With the one you love the most
Wouldn't be nice to say goodnight
To the one you hold so close
To your heart, to your heart...

The wind that blows the dove
Is the wind that blows my love
Hoping to find its way to you
Wherever you are

I love to sit in fields of green
Looking deeply thru the sky
Watching birds as they flap by
Hoping someday faith will bring me true love

Wouldn't be nice to hold someone
So dear, n near your heart
Wouldn't be nice to hear those words
I love you, from the one
That you love, that you love

The wind that blows the dove
Is the wind that blows my love
Hoping to find its way to you
Wherever you are

The wind that blows the dove
Is the wind that blows my love
Hoping to find its way to you
Wherever you are

I love to see myself one day
In the arms of someone
Who will share her life with me
Selflessly, someday you will find your way,
To me . . .

The wind that blows the dove
Is the wind that blows my love
Hoping to find its way to you
Wherever you are

The wind that blows the dove
Is the wind that blows my love
Hoping to find its way to you
Wherever you are, Wherever you are

 

I know this may sound mushy but I would want to sing this to my would be wife in my wedding day. hahaha
 ang korni